Misu Liusi

Ni-hou, my name is Misu Liusi. Well, not really, but that's my Chinese name. It's only fair if I'm going to expect my students to have an English name.

From what I've gathered from a few Chinese people, "Misu" means "miss you," and in some southern regions of China, it means "sweet." Perfect. And damn well easy for me to remember since that's what my friends call me at home anyway. Liusi is a surname that Luna gave me, who speaks incredible English. She said it's a very common surname in China. So I made an email address with my Chinese name so my students can contact me when they need help.

Yesterday was my first day teaching, at 8 am. I thought I would be confident but the insecurity hit me as soon as I stood behind the podium and saw the looks of bewilderment. It didn't help that the room was as hot as a crotch. I talked fast and normal, as I expected they would understand me, but I realized soon after that you must speak slower without condescending. Last night I volunteered to teach adults business English in a rural town outside of Baoding. It was interesting going there, walking into an engineering company that smelled like any old place smells like. Musky, like old libraries or grandparents' houses. This time I was the youngest instead of the oldest, and I did my best to try and wing my first day teaching something I had never taught. I saw it more as an experiment to see where they were at, if I could get to know them some, and what to expect in the next few weeks. We've got a lot of work to do, but I think I'm up for the task.

However, when I went to bed last night, I laid down feeling frustrated and apathetic toward the whole thing. Frustrated because I guess I expected it to magically come alive as soon as the day started, that my niche would just appear right before my eyes. Paths are not easy to pave. They take time and patience. I tried to convince myself of this, and to not be frustrated with the students either. This was only day one, and if I let it get to me this early enough in the game, I'd be screwed.

I woke up this morning exhausted (another 8 am class) but was ready in less than 20 minutes. That's insane when you include a shower. But I've noticed that since I've been in China I wake up pretty easily and don't want to waste time lying around in bed hitting the snooze. The thought of being late to one of my classes is enough to get my lazy ass out of bed and under the shower head.

Today was so much different than yesterday. I got to class early even though some students had already arrived. I avoided making any eye contact with them and worked on my roll sheet. Then the bell rang and I casually walked to the door and shut it. Then I happily exclaimed, "Ni hou!" (hello) and they eagerly said it back. I knew right then and there this was going to be a much better class than the one before. I told them a little about myself, that I love to sing, write, draw, listen to music, that I used to sing in a band. They thought that was neat. And then I said my Chinese was terrible, but I was working on it. I gave them my permission to laugh at my Chinese when each student pronounced their name. But when I'd get it right, some would start clapping excitedly. That made a huge difference.

There were some highly intelligent girls in this class. One girl, Amy, who sits in the front, spoke with such passion that it didn't sound like some memorized line to explain why you want to learn English. Another girl asked me to sing a song. I told her I would, eventually, but that we didn't have enough time today. Another girl said she was optimistic that I would be able to teach her English, and I praised her use of the word optimism. It allowed me a chance to explain the glass is half full/half empty scenario we so commonly use in English. I drew on the board two cans of Coca-Cola and explained the difference between optimism and pessimism, and that by using optimism while learning English is all the more rewarding.

I gave them my Chinese email and encouraged them to ask for help. I also told them that my grading scale will heavily depend on participation. While I will mark every error I spot and correct them, I'm not expecting perfection. If I can get as much involvement as possible in each class, I'll know I'm making a difference. I know learning English is not easy, because I'm trying to learn Chinese. They are helping me while I'm helping them. It's a fair trade.

I left feeling so good, so refreshed, so optimistic. Maybe I can make a decent teacher. I genuinely give a shit, even when I think I don't.

Later on, a woman from the administrator's office asked me if I was available around 3:30 to help conduct an interview. I gladly accepted. It was interesting...I kind of got thrown into it, not really knowing what I was in for. A young man was being interviewed for a position with the administration and I didn't realize they wanted me to start the interview. So I pulled out those skills I long since buried and asked him the very questions I had been asked so many times in the past. They wanted to know what I thought of his English. I sipped the tea they fed me and asked, "Where do you see yourself in five years?" Another thing I've learned about being in China is I shouldn't hate cliches so much. Sometimes they're actually useful, especially when being told to someone who's not used to hearing them.

Thanks to Alex I improved this blog and enabled it so you can put your comments. And you should check out hers: jumpingtherat.weebly.com.

Miss you, sweet.
Misu Liusi